A letter to Anna

Dear Anna,

My dear, dear, lady. To have every one know your heartache. I can only imagine that is very overwhelming. Take a deep breath.

Foremost I want to say that this is in no way your fault. You did nothing wrong. There is nothing wrong with you as a woman or a wife. There is nothing wrong with your Christianity or mothering of your children. He built this kingdom and now you all have to live with the public shame and reproach not just on your family but on the name of Jesus. Your husband did this to himself and his family and to the cause of Christ. No matter what you did you could not have made difference. He would have made these choices anyway. This is the way he wanted to go. Everyone has temptations and choices. He was weak and did not pass by them he enjoyed sin for a season.

You have several options. You could stay with this man, you could separate for a while, or you could divorce.

If you stay you will have plenty of guidance from people who took this path. In my opinion, you should do a few things before you go down this path.
         1. Make sure there is true repentance. Things need to be different. You are making the rules
             now.
         2. The computers need to be put on lock down and put in a common room in the home. No 
              more late night computer sessions.
         3. Counseling as a couple and individually. Not with someone you know but someone who can
             hold your husband accountable. You need to be able to safely talk about your feelings
             about his behavior against you and your children.
         4. You need to forgive to go forward. You cannot drag bitterness with you if you are going to
             stay. That will take much prayer and time. You can not hurry this. It will not happen
             overnight.

If you choose to separate for a while that might help you with your healing. It would give you time to process things without the pressure of him being there watching you. You need time and you may need some space to decide what you want to do.

If you decide to leave and file for divorce, the world would not fault you for doing that. They would applaud you. They would say you did the right thing. Then they would leave you out in cold and criticize your parenting publically. Most Christians would leave you and you would be left with very few but true and loyal friends. If your husbands repentance is not true, if he still thinks he is the boss of the home, and if you know better and feel that this is the best for you and your children then you must do it. It will be a hard road but you deserve to be valued and cherished. You are an amazing woman your heavenly Father has a wonderful plan for you and your kids. He will provide for you. It will not be an easy decision but if it God's plan for you then it will be blessed.


Pray, my friend, lots and lots of prayer will help you through this difficult time of decision. Stay in the bible. You will find wisdom and comfort in those pages.  Please do not make the decision everyone expects of you. Please do not make a decision out of pressure. Make the decision that God would have you to make because then He will be there with you every step of the way.

What ever way you decide to go Anna, God bless you. Our prayers are with you.

The Weakest Link

"Parents of gay or transgendered children are the weakest link in the church."

Well, that is what Kathy Baldock author of "Walking the Bridgeless Canyon" said to me during her discussion at Truckee Meadows Community College in the Spring of 2015. She was invited to speak for about an hour on her book. She wants to help build a bridge between the church and the LGBT community. She gave some history about how the church has treated the LGBT community over the last several hundred years and how it has changed so much in the last couple of decades. The church is still very far behind the world's view.

I thought at first that maybe this could happen but it really can't. It is not that the church is against the LGBT community but it is one group that says die to the flesh and live for God and the other says be true to yourself and you should be able to express how you truly feel. One group says, "less of me and more of Jesus" and the other group says. "I have the right to do what ever I want and you have to accept that."

It is a bridgeless canyon for a reason. There is not meant to be a bridge built by man from one side  to the another. The bridge is Jesus and what he has done on the cross. You can see and then use that bridge when you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Saviour.

What Ms. Baldock said at the end of discussion when I pressed her about the different bibles she was using was that it wasn't about the bible. Well if it is not about the bible then how can a profitable discussion occur about God's love and mercy to mankind. That is a Christian's guide and source of wisdom. It is not antiquated, it is the living book that God uses to speak to us.

She also said that the weakest link in the church is the parent of a gay child. That statement caught my attention. It took me a while to process that. So I am weak. Hmm...really. It made me instantly think of the verses about being weak.

"To the weak became I as weak, that I might gain the weak:

I am made all things to all men, that I might by all means save some."

I Corn. 9:22 KJV

Is God putting me in this position for a bigger reason? Can I be a help to other Christian parents that have a gay or transgender child? How can I be blessing? I do not have the answer to those questions yet. I know through prayer and searching the scriptures the answers will come.

"Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities,

in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong."

II Corn. 12:10 KJV

 

 

Is it just me or do you find that when someone says something negative about you, you make a choice of determined effort not to be that? Well, I knew for sure that I was not going to be weak and I for sure was not going to be the weakest link when it came to supporting God's Word in the church house.

 

I have a lot to process about these verses. I will leave you with verses that have been such an encouragement to me since I left that meeting.

 

 

2 Corinthians 12:9 KJV

"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."

 

I Corinthians 1:25 KJV

 

"Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men."

As for Me…

As for Me…

"But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD." Joshua 24:15b

 

      This is where Joshua is making a proclamation to Israel that they can do what they want but he is going to follow after God. It is such an aspiring story of courage and defiance of the masses. We see this verse on signs in people's home making that same stand against the world; We will stand for God.

     As a family starting out you may see this verse and think, "yes, I want my family to stand for God." You might even put some decisions in place as your children start to grow of how you will train them and also what you may do if they choose not to follow God. Your strong and confident that your family WILL serve God. You will raise your family better then you were raised and better then what others may or may not be doing at church. If Joshua can make this decision in that primitive culture, surely we can do it today.

      

     I have so many pictures and videos of my children saying and doing things for the Lord. Whether it be memorizing verses, singing in the choir, or helping out in class. They are so adorable. My sons made commitments when they were young to be preachers. One of my sons said that he had made a decision to be a missionary to India. He also wanted to be a detective so he decided he would be a missionary but when he wasn't preaching he would be a detective. Oh, they are so cute when they are young. So many times we went out and did things together for the Lord.

    

     But then the day comes when your child says that he does not want to go to church any more. That it is not his church but his parents church. He does not know for sure if there is a God or not. He only knows of his parent's God. He wants to figure it out for himself. Is that wrong to do? Should it have been something to cause me alarm? I don't think so.

      Isn't it a good thing that I have encouraged honest and courageous talk from my children? The fact that he felt comfortable enough to talk about this in this manner is critical to our relationship. When he approached me he was defensive about it because he had already told his father about what he was thinking and it did not go very well. I knew that I had to act in a different way.

    The advise I get from the church is to show him to the door if he doesn't want to follow the rules in my house. I could tell him it is my way or the highway. He is 16 years old. Is that a wise decision on my part to present to 16 year old that he either goes to church or he has to move out? Is that what that verse was saying? As for me and my house, so just move out when you don't agree with the statement. I do not think so.

   What would God do? He would listen. He would not feel threatened. He would encourage him to search for the truth. He would be there for him as he went through this journey and answer more questions. He would not abandon him. He would guide him back to Himself. God does not need me to defend Him to my son. My son knows the bible and he has seen a lot. He has seen hypocrisy all the way from the preacher, the church, and in his own home. Mind you I realize no one is perfect but there are some things done on purpose with no care as to anything or any one else. It is just done out of selfishness.

     How does this verse apply to my household even when the children start going in their own way? It means I still stand. I do not move. I stay put doing what I am supposed to be doing. When the children take notice of me while they are searching for answers I need to be just doing what God would have me doing. That means I do not have the liberty of doing my own thing but making sure I am doing God's thing. As for me...I will serve the Lord.

 

 

 



 

God's Word ~ Day 56

Today's reading Jeremiah 23:9- Jeremiah 33:22

"And the word of the Lord came unto Jeremiah saying." Jeremiah 33:19 KJB

Jeremiah was God's prophet and he was trying to convince the Israelites that what he was saying was true. He had two obstacles though:

1. The news he was telling them was not good news. They had to go to Babylon and be in bondage.

2. Hananiah, another prophet, was saying that what Jeremiah was saying was not from the Lord. Which the people liked hearing.

Now today we do not have to wonder if what we are hearing is from God or not because we have God's words in the King James Bible. We can compare what we are hearing to what God has told us in his Bible and then we will know the truth. Even if it is something we do not want to hear.