Friday, August 14, 2015
I chose to make a very difficult decision in my home a couple of weeks ago. It seemed that it hurt me more than it did the child. It actually broke my heart. I felt like I was in mourning about it for several days. But I know that I did the right thing. I hate making the hard choices. I hate calling out one of my kids. I hate being the enforcer. I want to be the good guy too however that is not what I am called to do. I want children that know that there are consequences. That there is a price to pay for your actions. I want my children to learn that while they are here at home where it is safe instead of when they are older and out in the world where there is no safety net.
I pray for wisdom and God's word says it will be given liberally to me however at times I think that if this is my with wisdom than I can't believe how completely inadequate I would be with out it. I need God all the time. Every day and every moment.
I have doubts. Isn't that part of being a good parent? Making sure you are going in the right direction. Seeking wisdom and counsel so that you stay on track. It is not easy being a parent. No one can parent my children better than me. I am the best parent for them. Even when it is hard. Especially when it is hard.