I am writing this to give you back the baggage you have placed on me. I am tired of being bitter and angry about the treatment that my family and I received and also my dear friends. You were so selfish about the way that you “counseled” your church members. Everything was about you and how it benefited you. You have caused so much damage here in the Reno/Sparks area. You think you are invincible but I think others have thought the same thing as well and look what happened to them.
The reign of destruction reaches very far. Still today there are so many people not in church because they cannot trust their pastor because they believe they will be used just like you used them. I hear them talk of the “church” like it was a cult. I believe them. It is a cult. It hurts the cause if Christ. It hurts a Christian’s walk. It ruins a church’s testimony in the community.
Anyone who has crossed paths with that church have a heart breaking story to tell. I am so embarrassed to admit that I was associated with that church.
I hate how you “counseled” me to stay with a man who would beat me. You, and your mother both said to stay. You did not value me at all. To think that I was trapped with a man who wanted to control me and when I did not obey, used physical measures. You just stood by and said to pray and read my bible more. Your mom even convinced that it was my fault because I must not be a good enough Christian.
I hate how you counseled me to just give him over to the computer for the gaming and God would take care of it. I was not to “nag” him about it. Just let God take care of it. That was so horrible to deal with. It was so degrading.
Countless women with the same marriage problems came through that church and you kept telling them to stay. Pray through. What kind of a person would allow women to continue to be abused? Probably a person who hates women. Probably a person who hates people in general. Probably a person who does not value life. Probably a person who is not saved.
Is that what your daughters get to look forward to? Tolerance. Turning a blind eye.
I hate how you handled the subject of pornography. It didn’t count because it was not real people. A lie straight from the pits of hell.
I hate how you make women feel less spiritual based on their outward appearance. The thinner they were the more spiritual they were.
I hate how you won’t confront abuse of children. That sickens me. Your actions are cowardly.
I hate how you treated members so poorly that they would just leave.
I hate how you kept raising the standards so that not even Jesus could reach them.
I hate how you twist God’s Word to control people.
I hate how nothing was more important than obedience. Obedience to your rules and way of thinking.
I hate how you want husbands to control their wives.
I hate how you treat wonderful people different.
I hate how you treat broken people.
I hate how you toss them aside.
I hate how you would do things in private but preach against them from the pulpit. (Children always give their parents away.)
I hate how you used people and then don’t care that they leave.
I hate how you judged people as worthy and others as not worthy.
I hate how you played favorites so openly and the trouble that it stirs up.
I hate how you make others sacrifice when you have plenty. I hate how you act like you are poor and you are not.
I hate when you deceive people and think it is ok.
I hate how you keep telling people that you walked away from sports when you know you were fired.
I hate how you think you control other pastors and act like they can’t do anything without your permission. That they will not be blessed of God because you don’t approve of what they want to do.
I hate how you said that the men that left this church would not be blessed in the ministry that they felt led by God to start.
I hate how you preach against people. I hate how you do it so specifically that we can tell who you are talking about.
I hate how you punish people from your pulpit.
I hate how you treat children. In public you seem so great and then when no one is looking you are abusive and controlling.
I hate how you are mean to people.
I wonder why you are acting like a minister when you do not like people.
I watch what people say about that church and you and it breaks my heart. It is like a reign of terror is in this Reno/Sparks area.
I struggle in so many areas because the years I spent there. You took advantage of me and women like me. You want control. People do not matter. Only your agenda. You say it is about God but it is not. The fruit says it is not. Good trees do not produce bad fruit.
I have not been able to go forward because of the damage in my heart. Everything I wanted to do had to be approved. Disapproval was given in abundance at that church.
I hate that I have carried it this long. I hate that even though I am not there, you are still controlling me. I hate when people bring you or the church up which makes the emotions and anger resurfaces like the pain is still fresh.
I hate that I judge pastors like you are the standard. You are a very poor example. I have met great men that want to serve their church and not rule it. They love the Lord and love people.
For all that you could have done for people and have chosen not to, I know you will be judged for the judgment you have judged others and then some.
Look around and see the damage you have done in the name of God. Families struggle and then fall apart because of how you are leading. You lead people in areas where you would never go. You are not a servant you are a ruler. You like to be king but do not know how to manage your kingdom.
You hurt, manipulate, use, punish, control, demean, and cause good people to turn away from church and a loving God. That makes me so angry!
I hate that it looks like you are getting away with this. The destruction and havoc that goes so far and so deep in myself and others.
I have to give this to God. I have to get out of his way so that He take care of you. I have to let this anger, bitterness and hatred go. I have so much going on that is so good and beautiful and I do not want you to taint it any more.
I serve a loving God who knows just how to take care of his own. This should make you worry because you are getting away with all of your lies and God is not doing anything to stop you.
My Saviour has taken such good care of me these last 5 years. But really he took care of me all along. He brought me to this great place of peace and joy.
I ask God to forgive me for putting you and your position as a pastor higher than the plans that God had for me. I ask God to forgive me for the hatred and anger that has turned to bitterness in my life. I ask God to forgive me for not trusting Him more and trusting man too much. I ask God to cleanse me from this and make me whole so that I can fully enjoy His blessing on my life.
Thank you God for showing me this ugliness in my life. Who am I to be writing this about someone else? I need healing and cleansing from it. I need to forgive. A true and sincere forgiveness. I am not perfect. I have treated people in a way that would shame Jesus. I want to use this as a learning tool. I want this to draw me closer to you Father.
If this causing the reader to want to share their story then here is your platform. However, please examine yourself and look for healing and comfort from the One who can give it.
Once you write it here, leave it here. God knew about it all along and He will take care of us just like He always has. Now that it is out in the open let God heal you.
There is no need to name names. God knows who we are talking about.
God bless you and me as we go on our journey to a better place and leave this behind us.